It’s stupid. I’m sort of just passing by in my life. I’ve never really worked or tried in my life, with the exception of one girl, but that is useless to talk about. I know that I should or at least that is what has been drilled into my mind all these years. You know, that classic go to school get good grades crap. Get a good job and find a wife. I think that I’m just fundamentally lazy, not to say there isn’t an instinctive, eager adventurer struggling to escape. No, not at all. I want to experience all there is to experience in the world. Travel to the four corners. But my lack of will crushes that adventurer.

I want to get good grades though, get a good job. All to please my parents. Hhahaha not in that “Get duh A+ not duh A-“, kind of please. More of the “I love you guys” sort of please. I owe them so much and I want to make them proud since they came over to Australia with nothing at all and they gave me all that I have now. I’m thankful. Honestly. I just want to you know, surprise them with a house one day. Give my dad a fucking Audi and my mum some pots and pans (she loves that shit. women. hahah nah just playing, but she really does love that stuff). I don’t know, that’s how I always saw my life though. I want to make them proud of me.

Friends come and go, I’ve witnessed that first hand but family, your brothers, sisters and most importantly your parents. They’re there for you. Period. I’m thankful for that on its own. I have friends that have some fucked up families and of course me and my parents argue, it’s human nature but it’s just sometimes I think that they don’t fully understand how much I love them. One of my friends asked me the other day if it was true that I’ve never had a girlfriend. It was weird, at that moment it occurred to me, I’ve never had a girlfriend. hahahah, fuuuuccckkk. I’ll get a killer job, get money and then get me a wifey. LOL. 

wow, I’m just procrastinating over 9000. I need to do this physics paper..